I know, I know.  It has been a long time since I updated this blog.  Quite frankly, life has been very busy lately and I haven’t known exactly what to share here.  So let me just give you a very quick update on things.  This won’t be a “flowery” post at all…just the facts, ma’am!

1)  Life at home has been kind of touch and go.  Some days are good…other days are not.  It seems that the weekends are the hardest.  I think that’s because my wife is home from work so she has more time to think about everything that is going on.  For her, everything has changed and yet nothing has changed.  This place of tension where she finds herself is very difficult.  She feels trapped “in between” and that is very hard for her.  Consequently, there has been more anger and frustration that she has been experiencing…and pointing towards me.  Not fun.  Plus, she and the kids are feeling very done with our church.  They are going through a spiritual crisis because of what is going on in their lives, and yet, they need to keep going to church and acting like everything is OK because I am a pastor.  So every Sunday is a day of difficulty right now.

2)  Because of all of the stuff above, my wife has been very clear with me that she wants me to have a new job before the end of the year.  So I have 6 months to get that figured out.  No pressure!  🙂

3)  I have begun my new church.  We have had two meetings and our now meeting weekly on Sunday afternoons.  Essentially, we are a small group…10 people…but we are laying the foundation for who and what we are going to be.  It has been exciting and refreshing for me.  It seems to be providing the type of community for people that they have been lacking…so for that I am thankful.  It makes me realize how difficult it is for gay people to find a place of spiritual connection.  The need is great!

4)  It is getting harder and harder for me to be at my current church.  I am changing.  My theology and philosophy of ministry are changing.  Because of that, I find that I am not walking on the same road as most of the rest of my church.  I don’t agree with some of the thinking that is entrenched in conservative Christianity anymore.  I don’t fit.  So it’s hard being there.

I’d appreciate your prayers as I begin to search for some sort of new job.  I need to find something that will pay the bills, will fit with my personality and gifts, and will provide the flexibility for me to lead the new church.

And I will try to update this blog more often.  Thanks for your interest in my life!

  1. Paul says:

    I’ll be praying for you brother. Especially about finding the perfect job, growing your new church and for the situation at home, especially your relationship with your wife and kids. I’d also be interested in knowing how your theology is changing specifically and how you are dealing with that.

  2. Hope and prayer it goes well. Prayers ascend. I know how hard it was as my marriage was ending. I had the feeling of a new beginning, moving toward something. My wife was just being left behind. Tough stuff. I still grieve.

  3. Bill says:

    Glad to finally hear from you. Prayers are with you in the new job search and good communication with each member of your family in this transition. Wm Bridges book on Transitions was helpful to me. It describes the various feelings one goes through when there is an “ending.’ It’s got some good stuff on the “middle zone” – when you are not at the new beginnings yet, and wandering in the desert. Hope there are folk around who can take you out to coffee and help you process – sorry I’m not in the area. I’ll also pray for discernment in your changing theology – a tricky path to take for those coming from a conservative, evangelical starting point. Peace.

  4. Ron says:

    I went through a process similar to what you are describing. What I can say is that God is good. Blessings on your journey.

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