It Feels SO Good!

Posted: April 3, 2011 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , ,

I gotta tell you…it really feels good.  It’s hard to describe the feeling…but maybe this pic will give you a visual:

That is how I feel lately.  I have stuck my neck out.  I’m feeling the wind against my face.  I’m enjoying the ride.  I look forward to where I’m going.  Life is good.

THAT is how I feel.  I can’t begin to explain HOW good it is to be myself and to find that I am accepted for who I am.  I know the feeling will be stronger when I have fully come out…but I am already beginning to get a taste of how nice it is.  I have friends with whom I can totally be myself…and that means gay AND Christian.  I just had a meeting yesterday with a denominational leader who accepted me as a gay pastor.  Wow!  She even apologized for the messages I received from the church earlier in my life.  Unbelievable!  My wife and I are having open conversations about the fact that she doesn’t see things the way she used to and that she now knows that change isn’t necessarily possible.  She accepts me now as a gay man!  Last week I met with two with gay Christians in the area and it was so nice to sit in public and talk openly about both faith and being gay.  I am getting a glimpse of what it is like not to have to hide…not to carry that weight on my shoulders…and it is SO NICE!  I look forward to the day when I can be who I am…100%…and not have to carry around the burden of secrecy that I have lived with for so long.  Sometime in the next year, that will be a reality.

I am gay.  I am a pastor.  And I am loved by God.

It all feels SO good!

 

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Comments
  1. toujoursdan says:

    That makes me so happy.

  2. Fred says:

    Thanks for sharing your story with the world. You are courageous. My situation is similar, except I don’t have kids. AND I’m in the closet – BIG difference. But I’m an evangelical pastor, I’ve tried the ex-gay thing, and it just doesn’t work. I’ll be praying for you as you continue your journey of hope and transformation.

  3. I’m so glad you can rejoice in it. I know the feeling. And, with all the other stuff that besets me, I recall how good it feels to be authentic, to be me. Prayers ascend.

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